Listening to: Pandora Radio, Korn channel :)
Hmm, I wonder why my Pandora commercials are in Spanish? Haha, it's kind of funny.
I am a fairly simple girl with few luxuries, but yesterday was all about pampering myself. We get our house cleaned once in a while, thanks to my mom's business, so we thought yesterday would be a great time to do it. I treated myself to an egg, cheese, (cheddar and cream cheese, thank you very much) and ham bagel in the morning then had my eyebrows and nails done. I was seriously starting to look like Frida Kahlo. I have never had such long nails before, because I have had the worst nail-biting habit for as long as I can remember! Those prenatal vitamins sure work wonders! I don't know why, but whether I'm doing my nails myself or have others do them, I find it to be very relaxing. The house smells clean, carpets are vacuumed, everything is dusted and put away, counter tops are spotless and I can eat off the kitchen floor. There is nothing like it!!!
So, even though baby is head down at the moment, last week on the ultrasound she showed to be facing posterior, as in facing my belly. That isn't ideal for the way our pelvis is shaped, meaning if she does not turn around, I will have a very long, painful labor. Also known as "back labor". The majority end up being pitocin/epidural/c-section deliveries so I hope- so very badly- that she will get into the anterior position before I go into labor! I've been doing exercises from Spinning Babies, and have seen a homeopathic chiropractor to hopefully get my pelvis & spine back into alignment. I've always had back/hip issues, I wish I would have addressed this sooner. My dad is so funny, calling me last night to tell me it was a full moon and asking if I was prepared. I wish I could tell him that yes, I have a feeling she will come that soon but I really don't. I joke and say I hope she comes Sunday the 22nd because my birthday is the 23rd, I can always say I had her when I was 30 and not 31. LOL! Ah, my birthday. That's right! To be completely honest, I had forgotten all about it. It's funny because in my family, we've always made a big deal about our birthdays. I always made sure everyone knew mine was coming up. The morning of any one of our birthdays, we loudly play "Las mananitas", a spanish song about your special birthday. We've always had cake and presents. Matt's family does the same thing, with the exception of las mananitas. ;) The plan is to have the PAMF girls over for brunch at the house Sunday, then both families over for pizza and cake. Sounds like the perfect day to me! I find it interesting that I've been so consumed with baby stuff that I actually forgot my birthday! Hah!
Now, if baby makes her appearance before then, we'll have to revise the entire thing. ;)
Matt seems eager to give me my gift now, but I told him we should wait for both families to open presents. I wonder what it is?!
After my second day of my chiro appointment, I feel so much better. I don't feel like my pelvic bone is being shredded to pieces every time I stand! Baby has definitely dropped because I can breathe much better, and my walk today wasn't so strenuous. I feel good! Heavy and slow, but painless.
So it's officially 9/20 now, since it is after midnight. Baby has hiccups. It is pretty amazing- I feel them more now than ever since she's bigger and stronger. I have an OB visit tomorrow with a female MD I have only met twice for my follow up NST. I had thought about checking to see if I'm dilated or effaced at all, but after some thought I figure I will wait until I see my regular OB on the 25th, if there haven't been any signs of labor. If it isn't necessary, why chance an infection? I'm not comfortable with them poking around in there just because I happen to be curious. I don't remember if I wrote about last Saturday, then again I don't remember much of anything these days. After Meg, Anthea and Char left & the amazing day we had here at my house, I started to get cramps. They seemed to be getting progressively worse, so naturally I was starting to think OK this is it! I got on my birthing ball, rolled around for a bit, took a shower, went to bed only to wake up around 3am feeling pretty terrible still. My doula, Deidre, was out of town so I started to get really nervous. I woke up again around 8am feeling the same but as the day progressed I felt fine. After a while, they came back but it was constant, nothing I could really time. I was almost sure I'd have this baby by Sunday night or Monday. By Monday night, though I was back to normal. I read that with a "sunny side up" baby, this can happen. Your body may trick you into thinking you're about to go into labor, but nope! Just kidding. I emailed Deidre to tell her about my cramps and she explained that what I was going through sounded a lot like very early labor. It is a full moon mid-week so I must be prepared. She advised me to take warm baths, to try to relax as much as possible. Honestly, I don't know how women do this without a doula. The support is nothing short of amazing.
So now we are very close to the 39th week, and I haven't gotten any other signs. I was just telling Matt that as much as I already love this little person growing inside me, I think it is time she start considering making her debut. I'm heavy, tired, big, and have other lady part stuff going on that I'd rather not go into detail about. I barely share these things with my own husband! Don't get me wrong, we're pretty intimate (duh) and there are no secrets between us, but does he really have to know about leaking nipples or weird discharge? I think not. Thankfully, I don't have either but you get the idea. That's why I have other women to talk to, and my very much appreciated doula!
I'm such a fatty. I'm in my kitchen, eating leftover coffee cake from Hobbe's and chocolate soy milk. They are so ridiculously good, especially at this hour. I didn't even take a nap today, what gives?
Oh! Now that I think of it. Another strange occurrence: Sgt refused to sleep downstairs in his bed last night, where he has been sleeping for the past 4 years. He came up next to the bed on my side, giving me puppy eyes. How could I resist? We set his bed up on the floor next to me, and he was perfectly content as he fell asleep. I was sure I'd go into labor then. Nope, false alarm. He has been incredibly needy since I'd say around the 8th week of pregnancy. He may have been before that, I just hadn't noticed. Animals are so smart and amazing. There is a possibility that I just spoil him with so much affection that he expects it all the time? Who knows, all I know is that he senses something is different, and he is no longer the baby of the house. There will be a new member in the pack & he will be the less dominant one. Aww, my little boy. We will still show him we love him, and I know he will be great with baby.
I should really sleep. Big day ahead of me tomorrow...lol! Not really. I started watching Breaking Bad but it just isn't really my thing. I can't get into Orange is the New Black, everyone raves about it but I just don't see what the big deal is. I could care less about the whiny main character, and even less about the rest. It's crude, nasty, and just not entertaining to me. I finished Sister Wives pretty quickly, and now I have to look for season 3 since it isn't on Netflix. I think it's pretty interesting, to see how polygamists live. To them, it's a completely normal lifestyle. I feel that if they aren't hurting anyone, they aren't taking advantage of tax payers' money, then who are we to judge how they live? They are happy, they serve their community, whatever! To each their own. The government should be worried about WAY bigger fish to fry. Now I am rambling.
We'll see how I sleep tonight, I have another appointment with the chiropractor Saturday, and I'm looking forward to that one since Matt can come with me.
Ok, officially tired. Until next time...maybe baby will be here by then, you never know. :o)
Ticker
Friday, September 20, 2013
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Another Day...
These last few weeks are looooong and dragging. I was up until almost 3 am last night, I just cannot sleep. No matter what position I get myself into, I am not comfortable. I cuddled with hubs as it is the only way I can fall asleep, but it's a matter of time before I wake up from either pain or having to use the restroom. This morning I woke up from a muscle spasm in my back, and my god was it painful! Matt got up to plug in my heating pad, and lovingly placed it underneath me. Talk about immediate relief! And yay for such a great husband, am I right? I slept for another 2 hours or so. That seems to be the pattern lately. I got up around 9, lazily made myself a couple of waffles and 2 eggs, checked my email and continued my Sex and the City marathon. After I finished eating I took the Sarge for a walk, and was surprised to find that it was really a nice day, warm but with a breeze. It was refreshing. Got back, had some grapes, and started scouting for freezable meals to make. I made an awesome tuna noodle casserole, but now my feet are killing me. I don't have the energy to clean up, and I hate it! I wonder how well the casserole will freeze?
I read an article online about what pregnant women hate to hear. Among those were: "You're about to pop!" "Are you carrying twins?" "You better get all the sleep you can now before baby comes!" (or do things now that you like to do- wait, what?) "Can I touch your belly?" Or do it without asking. "You are going to need that epidural!" And the list goes on and on.
I've gotten the twin comment by a thin woman who did my pedicure once. It bothered me at first, but I realized how unimportant she is to me. The only one that particularly bugs me is the implication that my life is officially over by having a baby, it's absurd. Believe me, I plan on taking my little girl places. Nothing stops me from having a good time...seriously, since when does the world stop just because you have a baby? Obviously, our lives will be different, things will change but it is up to you how you handle those changes. You can either make it really difficult for yourself, or embrace it and enjoy it as much as possible. They take naps, do they not? I have 3 different carriers so I can have her with me everywhere I go for the first few months of her life. Last I checked, I don't recall hearing about any permanent damage done to a baby due to car rides, Disneyland, camping, parks or walks. I plan on still going on dinner, movie and concert dates with hubs. My mother did not get a crib to keep in their home for nothing! I still plan on seeing my friends for brunch or lunch, or pedis or whatever I feel like! Matt still plans on playing hockey on some weekends. My point is, our lives will not come to a complete stop and will not be totally consumed by this little creature we've created. Her life will be full of adventures as well, even from the start.
I read an article online about what pregnant women hate to hear. Among those were: "You're about to pop!" "Are you carrying twins?" "You better get all the sleep you can now before baby comes!" (or do things now that you like to do- wait, what?) "Can I touch your belly?" Or do it without asking. "You are going to need that epidural!" And the list goes on and on.
I've gotten the twin comment by a thin woman who did my pedicure once. It bothered me at first, but I realized how unimportant she is to me. The only one that particularly bugs me is the implication that my life is officially over by having a baby, it's absurd. Believe me, I plan on taking my little girl places. Nothing stops me from having a good time...seriously, since when does the world stop just because you have a baby? Obviously, our lives will be different, things will change but it is up to you how you handle those changes. You can either make it really difficult for yourself, or embrace it and enjoy it as much as possible. They take naps, do they not? I have 3 different carriers so I can have her with me everywhere I go for the first few months of her life. Last I checked, I don't recall hearing about any permanent damage done to a baby due to car rides, Disneyland, camping, parks or walks. I plan on still going on dinner, movie and concert dates with hubs. My mother did not get a crib to keep in their home for nothing! I still plan on seeing my friends for brunch or lunch, or pedis or whatever I feel like! Matt still plans on playing hockey on some weekends. My point is, our lives will not come to a complete stop and will not be totally consumed by this little creature we've created. Her life will be full of adventures as well, even from the start.
I am frequently asked by people if they can touch my belly and it doesn't bother me at all. The comments about getting the epidural used to bug me, but at this point I smile politely and just nod my head. It's none of their business how I plan to birth my child. Nor am I obligated to tell them why I think a natural delivery is best. Believe me, sometimes I do want to open my mouth, but it is most certainly not my place. Why is motherhood such a competition? I love to hear people's birth stories, whether it was a positive or a negative one because all births are different and I know mine will be unique. To each their own! There is no point in getting all worked up and being overly sensitive. Sometimes people are awkward when they don't know what to say. I personally don't like to feel like I'm walking on egg shells with someone, I certainly wouldn't want anyone to feel that way about me. Whew. It feels good to vent and rant, rant rant!
Now that I've taken this break, it is time to make yet another meal to add to the freezer. Man, I'm on a ROLL! ;)
Monday, September 9, 2013
The Joys of Pregnancy! 37 weeks...
Listening to...the sound of the fan going, because it is crazy HOT today!!!
This entry is not by any means to complain about the changes I'm going through; though it may seem that way. It's just a vent. I'm allowed, right? I never post anything on those baby website message boards, because I've read some threads where people can be pretty mean. I don't understand how us women can be so petty with one another, especially while hiding behind a computer. Does it make them feel better about themselves? What's the point? I feel that as women, we should empower each other, respect our differences, learn from and support one another. I stay far far away from the useless drama. I have far more important things to do, things to worry about. It seems like some of these girls are only on the boards to ridicule others. I say girls because that's exactly what they are. Ok, rant over. HAHA hormonal much?
I know very well how lucky I am that I was able to conceive when we wanted to, not everyone has that opportunity. I am sure those people would do anything to be in my shoes. Please believe me when I say that I am happy, very happy that we are growing our family and I am going to be a mom! What a blessing! However, it does not mean that it doesn't come with its challenges, as I'm sure many other first time moms can relate.
I've realized that from here on out I will have my good days, when I feel just fine enough to cook a couple of meals to freeze for after baby is born & to do other household chores, then I have my days when I feel like my body has been hit by a moving train- a perfect example of that was this morning. I do not recall doing anything remotely strenuous yesterday, I wasn't on my feet or sitting for too long, so I don't exactly know what triggers it. I guess it's just pregnancy. I am a chronic tummy sleeper, which I know is terrible for my back, but it's the way I've always fallen asleep. Now that I can't sleep that way, it's been a difficult night right after the next. I sleep on my left side a lot, but there are certain pressure points that hurt when I lay that way all night. We have a fairly new firm mattress, which I otherwise love but we also have a memory foam mattress top thinking it would help me sleep better during pregnancy. In addition to that I use a pregnancy pillow, which is as tall as I am and supports both my back and in between my knees. I can barely roll over to the other side though; my groin, back, pelvic and hip muscles are in so much pain, I'm almost in tears when I try. I get temporary relief when I actually get onto the other side, but my hands and fingers ache from carpal tunnel, so at that point I'm usually awake enough to feel the intensity from it all. I cannot bend my fingers, because when I go to grab my blanket or pillow, I cringe from the pain. Not only that, but my hands can get tingly and numb because my entire arm falls asleep. Sometimes I feel like I can't breathe, so I prop myself up with all of my pillows but again, I am on my back. Sorry, doc it is the only way I can get a good 4-6 hours of quality sleep. Of course that is if I don't have to pee 7 times throughout the night. But even in that position, my bum is sore from sitting on it all night. If I get on my side that way, by back is out of alignment and it's hellooo major back pain! Matt says I snore now. I've actually woken myself up from how loudly I snore! Pretty funny, actually. Well, if you look on the bright side, at least I don't have that awful rash anymore, eh? I also do not have hyperemesis like some pregnant women do, it's rare to have it throughout pregnancy but it does happen. I used to treat those women with hydration. They actually almost deterred me from ever having children! So, thankfully I do not have that condition. I actually did not vomit once. I know.
I'm experiencing "lightening crotch" now, actually since around the 35th week or so. Apparently it means that baby has dropped into the pelvic canal. It isn't a pleasant feeling. The term used for this phenomenon is pretty self explanatory. It's been quite a few times now that when I walk, I almost can envision her little head coming out of me. I may sound a bit dramatic, but it's the only way I know how to describe it. I've read that I should probably feel less pressure on my ribs, but that isn't quite so. Even as I sit up straight, I am still out of breath so maybe she's just a big baby. :) I'm so glad we are both healthy. I do admit to being nervous about the birthing process, only because it is the unknown, but I am thankful for our doula and the support I have found with other moms that have delivered naturally. Of course, our families are huge supporters as well.
I am so incredibly excited to meet our little one. It is only a matter of time.
This entry is not by any means to complain about the changes I'm going through; though it may seem that way. It's just a vent. I'm allowed, right? I never post anything on those baby website message boards, because I've read some threads where people can be pretty mean. I don't understand how us women can be so petty with one another, especially while hiding behind a computer. Does it make them feel better about themselves? What's the point? I feel that as women, we should empower each other, respect our differences, learn from and support one another. I stay far far away from the useless drama. I have far more important things to do, things to worry about. It seems like some of these girls are only on the boards to ridicule others. I say girls because that's exactly what they are. Ok, rant over. HAHA hormonal much?
I know very well how lucky I am that I was able to conceive when we wanted to, not everyone has that opportunity. I am sure those people would do anything to be in my shoes. Please believe me when I say that I am happy, very happy that we are growing our family and I am going to be a mom! What a blessing! However, it does not mean that it doesn't come with its challenges, as I'm sure many other first time moms can relate.
I've realized that from here on out I will have my good days, when I feel just fine enough to cook a couple of meals to freeze for after baby is born & to do other household chores, then I have my days when I feel like my body has been hit by a moving train- a perfect example of that was this morning. I do not recall doing anything remotely strenuous yesterday, I wasn't on my feet or sitting for too long, so I don't exactly know what triggers it. I guess it's just pregnancy. I am a chronic tummy sleeper, which I know is terrible for my back, but it's the way I've always fallen asleep. Now that I can't sleep that way, it's been a difficult night right after the next. I sleep on my left side a lot, but there are certain pressure points that hurt when I lay that way all night. We have a fairly new firm mattress, which I otherwise love but we also have a memory foam mattress top thinking it would help me sleep better during pregnancy. In addition to that I use a pregnancy pillow, which is as tall as I am and supports both my back and in between my knees. I can barely roll over to the other side though; my groin, back, pelvic and hip muscles are in so much pain, I'm almost in tears when I try. I get temporary relief when I actually get onto the other side, but my hands and fingers ache from carpal tunnel, so at that point I'm usually awake enough to feel the intensity from it all. I cannot bend my fingers, because when I go to grab my blanket or pillow, I cringe from the pain. Not only that, but my hands can get tingly and numb because my entire arm falls asleep. Sometimes I feel like I can't breathe, so I prop myself up with all of my pillows but again, I am on my back. Sorry, doc it is the only way I can get a good 4-6 hours of quality sleep. Of course that is if I don't have to pee 7 times throughout the night. But even in that position, my bum is sore from sitting on it all night. If I get on my side that way, by back is out of alignment and it's hellooo major back pain! Matt says I snore now. I've actually woken myself up from how loudly I snore! Pretty funny, actually. Well, if you look on the bright side, at least I don't have that awful rash anymore, eh? I also do not have hyperemesis like some pregnant women do, it's rare to have it throughout pregnancy but it does happen. I used to treat those women with hydration. They actually almost deterred me from ever having children! So, thankfully I do not have that condition. I actually did not vomit once. I know.
I'm experiencing "lightening crotch" now, actually since around the 35th week or so. Apparently it means that baby has dropped into the pelvic canal. It isn't a pleasant feeling. The term used for this phenomenon is pretty self explanatory. It's been quite a few times now that when I walk, I almost can envision her little head coming out of me. I may sound a bit dramatic, but it's the only way I know how to describe it. I've read that I should probably feel less pressure on my ribs, but that isn't quite so. Even as I sit up straight, I am still out of breath so maybe she's just a big baby. :) I'm so glad we are both healthy. I do admit to being nervous about the birthing process, only because it is the unknown, but I am thankful for our doula and the support I have found with other moms that have delivered naturally. Of course, our families are huge supporters as well.
I am so incredibly excited to meet our little one. It is only a matter of time.
Friday, September 6, 2013
Labor Day weekend
Today has been exactly the kind of day I needed. I think I did way too much yesterday and my body was screaming at me. I should probably learn to listen to my body especially since I'm only 4 weeks away from my 40th week of pregnancy! I fell asleep quickly last night propped up with pillows, and found that it lessened the pelvic pain immensely. YAY, this makes me so happy! I woke up the first time at 3:45 am to pee, then again at 6 am. By that time it was already pretty bright out, but I managed to sleep for another 2 hours. I was incredibly hungry so Matt and I made a huge breakfast. He talked about washing the carpet downstairs so I went back to my bed with the intention of reading our hospital booklet & listen to Live 105 since they're playing "old school" music all weekend that makes me nostalgic and perfectly content. Before I knew it, I woke up from a nap an hour later. I found out that during my nap, Mr. Rhoads had done laundry, went grocery shopping at Costco, and washed the carpet twice. Do I have an amazing husband, or what??
Making me brownies because I was craving them...
Cutting wood to add to the deck, adding glow-in-the-dark stars to the nursery's ceiling....
and those are only a few of the things he's been up to. I have zero doubt in my mind that this man will make an excellent father.
We can't wait to meet baby...the reason why I keep calling her baby is because we plan on keeping her name a surprise. We had people at our baby shower vote for one out of 3 names we had picked out and the winner was clearly one of them.
Wow, I cannot believe I'm going to be a mom....a MOM!!!!
Making me brownies because I was craving them...
Cutting wood to add to the deck, adding glow-in-the-dark stars to the nursery's ceiling....
and those are only a few of the things he's been up to. I have zero doubt in my mind that this man will make an excellent father.
We can't wait to meet baby...the reason why I keep calling her baby is because we plan on keeping her name a surprise. We had people at our baby shower vote for one out of 3 names we had picked out and the winner was clearly one of them.
Wow, I cannot believe I'm going to be a mom....a MOM!!!!
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
35 Weeks...
Currently listening to: Deftones, White Pony
Well! We are at 35 weeks and counting!
I keep telling myself that I need to update this thing, I need to keep a journal of everything I have gone through during my pregnancy but I always find other things to do; like Pinterest, and implementing ideas from there ;). I'm popping in a frozen eggplant parmesan for dinner so I don't have to be on my feet tonight, so now here I am, blogging. I've got my kitchen table in the kitchen now, (we are transforming the dining area into a play area) bought myself some pretty pink flowers for the table for aesthetics, a passion fruit tea from Starbucks, dude, I'm ready to do this!
At this point in my pregnancy I'm slowly growing more and more uncomfortable. Sleep is a thing of the past, or at least a full night's sleep. My body is preparing for more long nights, I get it, but if you know me at all you'd know it isn't what I've looked forward to when it comes to motherhood. I need to suck it up, and realize it is inevitable. I have a couple of books on my Amazon wishlist that hopefully I will read before baby comes, just for tips on getting baby to sleep as long as possible during the night. I know that as a newborn she will need to feed frequently, but as she grows I'm sure it only gets easier. I'm a night person, which Matt isn't so I think he will probably have more of a hard time than I will. We shall see, we only have a few weeks left to go. I feel like we still have so much more to do, but I know that's normal. I've done so much reading and research, it's ridiculous.
We have yet to figure out the logistics of it all, she won't be in her crib for a few weeks or more so the bassinet in our bedroom will come in handy, but the rocking chair can be moved downstairs for when I want to feed downstairs during the day. I've never really been much of a routine kind of girl and that has to change with baby. They need routine and consistency. While I feel emotionally ready, I've also grown quite attached to my belly. I love knowing how tucked away and safe she is in there, and bringing her into this world will have its challenges. I want to teach her that while there is a lot of ugly and evil in this world, there is also good and that's what is most important.
Even though we were married in a Catholic church, we are not religious. At one point in my life I had said that my personal relationship with God was just that, personal and private. After giving it a lot of thought I came to the conclusion that there really wasn't a relationship at all. I just wanted to think there was a powerful entity up there who looked over me and talked to me in my head but now that's just absurd to me. I love the way Matt was brought up in his family. He was taught that you are accountable for your own actions, that everything is a choice in life. There is a mutual respect among parents and children. He was raised to be a good person, understand the difference between right and wrong, without the use of a frightening after-life threat. I remember growing up feeling confused and ashamed about everything that I ever felt, everything that I thought, but never fully understanding why. Science & good music will be huge in this household, because let's face it, it is all I'm about! :D
I suppose I should get on cleaning the living room and kitchen, since our doula is coming by this evening to work on our birth plan, and discuss what will happen the day I go into labor. I am very excited to work with her. While almost everyone I talk to just has to tell me about how painful childbirth is, I have learned to tune it out with my own positive thoughts. Everyone has their own way of dealing with pain, and not to mention whatever you decide to do with your body and your baby is ultimately up to...well, you. I'm not judging other moms, especially since I haven't gone through labor yet, but I don't think of it as a medical emergency, and I certainly can't fathom agreeing to unnecessary major surgery because I couldn't deal with the pain. I can't imagine it being like how you see it on TV, dramatic and gut-wrenching. I know it will be unbearable, I know it will make me want drugs, I know I'm probably going to want to punch someone in the face and that someone will most likely be Matt, lol. But I think I'm a strong individual, and with my stubbornness, I am pretty positive I'll have the outcome I wish to have. I refuse to be doped up and have a drugged baby in my arms. I want to be able to feel my legs, I want for the both of us to be alert and bond. I want to be able to leave the hospital and go home with our new bundle of joy as soon as possible. If I hear one more person tell me that I do not have control over this, I will scream!! As far as I am concerned, I am more in control without medication than with them, and people really need to keep their negative comments to themselves. Obviously, should a life or death situation arise, I will utilize my other options which I am grateful to have in the first place. From what I have learned and understand, medical interventions only lead to more medical interventions. If I could avoid them altogether, I should be fine. I respect my OB's decisions, as he respects mine. My pregnancy has not had any complications thus far, therefore there is no reason for any medical interventions.
My doula explained that when her clients ask for the pain meds, it is usually during the transition phase, the last and most difficult phase in labor. They are at the point of giving birth and there is not enough time for the meds to "kick in" so it is essentially pointless. I need to keep that in mind. She told Matt that since I feel so strongly about being able to give birth naturally, he should never tell me to just take meds, because it completely undermines what I feel so strongly about. We are both on the same page regarding drugs, but It will be hard for him to see me in pain so he must also remain strong- for me, for us and baby. After the initial doula meeting, subsequent meetings and after taking a Comfort Techniques for Labor class with awesome doulas, midwives and nurses, I feel super empowered! Let's do this! A mantra I need to repeat for myself no matter how painful labor is: my body knows perfectly what it needs to do, it is the mind that does not.
We have come a long way in medicine, but honestly, we have SO much more to go when it comes to maternity care. Buuut that's a whole other blog entry I will not get into at the moment.
Until next time. :)
Well! We are at 35 weeks and counting!
I keep telling myself that I need to update this thing, I need to keep a journal of everything I have gone through during my pregnancy but I always find other things to do; like Pinterest, and implementing ideas from there ;). I'm popping in a frozen eggplant parmesan for dinner so I don't have to be on my feet tonight, so now here I am, blogging. I've got my kitchen table in the kitchen now, (we are transforming the dining area into a play area) bought myself some pretty pink flowers for the table for aesthetics, a passion fruit tea from Starbucks, dude, I'm ready to do this!
At this point in my pregnancy I'm slowly growing more and more uncomfortable. Sleep is a thing of the past, or at least a full night's sleep. My body is preparing for more long nights, I get it, but if you know me at all you'd know it isn't what I've looked forward to when it comes to motherhood. I need to suck it up, and realize it is inevitable. I have a couple of books on my Amazon wishlist that hopefully I will read before baby comes, just for tips on getting baby to sleep as long as possible during the night. I know that as a newborn she will need to feed frequently, but as she grows I'm sure it only gets easier. I'm a night person, which Matt isn't so I think he will probably have more of a hard time than I will. We shall see, we only have a few weeks left to go. I feel like we still have so much more to do, but I know that's normal. I've done so much reading and research, it's ridiculous.
We have yet to figure out the logistics of it all, she won't be in her crib for a few weeks or more so the bassinet in our bedroom will come in handy, but the rocking chair can be moved downstairs for when I want to feed downstairs during the day. I've never really been much of a routine kind of girl and that has to change with baby. They need routine and consistency. While I feel emotionally ready, I've also grown quite attached to my belly. I love knowing how tucked away and safe she is in there, and bringing her into this world will have its challenges. I want to teach her that while there is a lot of ugly and evil in this world, there is also good and that's what is most important.
Even though we were married in a Catholic church, we are not religious. At one point in my life I had said that my personal relationship with God was just that, personal and private. After giving it a lot of thought I came to the conclusion that there really wasn't a relationship at all. I just wanted to think there was a powerful entity up there who looked over me and talked to me in my head but now that's just absurd to me. I love the way Matt was brought up in his family. He was taught that you are accountable for your own actions, that everything is a choice in life. There is a mutual respect among parents and children. He was raised to be a good person, understand the difference between right and wrong, without the use of a frightening after-life threat. I remember growing up feeling confused and ashamed about everything that I ever felt, everything that I thought, but never fully understanding why. Science & good music will be huge in this household, because let's face it, it is all I'm about! :D
I suppose I should get on cleaning the living room and kitchen, since our doula is coming by this evening to work on our birth plan, and discuss what will happen the day I go into labor. I am very excited to work with her. While almost everyone I talk to just has to tell me about how painful childbirth is, I have learned to tune it out with my own positive thoughts. Everyone has their own way of dealing with pain, and not to mention whatever you decide to do with your body and your baby is ultimately up to...well, you. I'm not judging other moms, especially since I haven't gone through labor yet, but I don't think of it as a medical emergency, and I certainly can't fathom agreeing to unnecessary major surgery because I couldn't deal with the pain. I can't imagine it being like how you see it on TV, dramatic and gut-wrenching. I know it will be unbearable, I know it will make me want drugs, I know I'm probably going to want to punch someone in the face and that someone will most likely be Matt, lol. But I think I'm a strong individual, and with my stubbornness, I am pretty positive I'll have the outcome I wish to have. I refuse to be doped up and have a drugged baby in my arms. I want to be able to feel my legs, I want for the both of us to be alert and bond. I want to be able to leave the hospital and go home with our new bundle of joy as soon as possible. If I hear one more person tell me that I do not have control over this, I will scream!! As far as I am concerned, I am more in control without medication than with them, and people really need to keep their negative comments to themselves. Obviously, should a life or death situation arise, I will utilize my other options which I am grateful to have in the first place. From what I have learned and understand, medical interventions only lead to more medical interventions. If I could avoid them altogether, I should be fine. I respect my OB's decisions, as he respects mine. My pregnancy has not had any complications thus far, therefore there is no reason for any medical interventions.
My doula explained that when her clients ask for the pain meds, it is usually during the transition phase, the last and most difficult phase in labor. They are at the point of giving birth and there is not enough time for the meds to "kick in" so it is essentially pointless. I need to keep that in mind. She told Matt that since I feel so strongly about being able to give birth naturally, he should never tell me to just take meds, because it completely undermines what I feel so strongly about. We are both on the same page regarding drugs, but It will be hard for him to see me in pain so he must also remain strong- for me, for us and baby. After the initial doula meeting, subsequent meetings and after taking a Comfort Techniques for Labor class with awesome doulas, midwives and nurses, I feel super empowered! Let's do this! A mantra I need to repeat for myself no matter how painful labor is: my body knows perfectly what it needs to do, it is the mind that does not.
We have come a long way in medicine, but honestly, we have SO much more to go when it comes to maternity care. Buuut that's a whole other blog entry I will not get into at the moment.
Until next time. :)
23 Weeks...
At 23 weeks, I am just now realizing that there is a tiny human being inside me, doing somersaults, kicking, punching and head butting me. I mean, obviously I've always known, but to feel her is something completely amazing. Rhoads can now also feel her bumps, he put his ear to my belly last night and talked to her. She seemed to have been really excited to hear daddy's voice because she was kicking like crazy! I could actually see his head jolting from the kicks. I am so emotional these days that I was laughing and crying at the same time. Also, I felt her hiccups just the other day. I was told I will be able to feel them eventually, but I had no idea what it was like. I was feeling tiny jumps inside me every few seconds, then it hit me. She has hiccups! It is so crazy.
Thursday, May 30, 2013
It's A...!
Listening to: Dredg, El Cielo
Have we really come to the end of May already?
We had our 20 week anatomy ultrasound three weeks ago, and had to wait to find out baby's gender. We had a small gender reveal party a couple of days after the appointment, to be surprised along with everyone else. It was SO much fun, and I am so glad we did it.
It's a GIRL! Now, I realize there is a 20% chance that baby could be a boy, and I want to be certain so we may go to a clinic nearby for a 3D/4D ultrasound. I pitched the idea to Rhoads so we shall see what he says.
I have to admit, for 5 months I was thinking it was a boy, and I felt a slight pang of disappointment for feeling disappointed, but it really is a strong word for how I actually felt. I envisioned my life with a house full of boys, busy with baseball and hockey games, playing with our dogs, (still working on convincing the hubs to get another) full of energy and happiness. I love boy stuff, I've never been a frilly pink kind of girl. I started to feel like a bad person, like I could never be a good mother to a little girl. I always seemed to get along better with the opposite sex, even as a little girl myself. We are sensitive, complex creatures! But I got past all of that, I just needed to change my mindset completely. I thought about how amazing Rhoads will be with a girl, and yes, even me. I don't have to dress her in frilly pink stuff, there are plenty of yellows, purples and green outfits out there. I will raise her to be confident, strong, and intelligent. She will think for herself, respect and be respected. It will be tough, but someone has to do it!
The shower invitations have been mailed out yesterday. They were handmade, and let me tell you, they were a lot of work, but it beats paying up the ying yang for invitations. I don't care how cute they are, I'm sorry but I can't justify paying over $100 for some paper. Of course this meant that I needed to get on our registries to make final modifications. Here I thought we were all good with most of the basic stuff for baby, but after finishing both Babies R Us and Amazon registries, I counted 295 total items that we registered for. Seriously?! For all I know, we may not need it all but I'm a research junkie so evidently, in my mind, I am making myself think that I need all of those things. It's hard because we won't know what's what until baby arrives. I keep calling her "baby" because we have narrowed it down to 3 names, and when we meet her, I think we will know which one is best for her. Ughhh what if it's a boy, though? The thought keeps creeping into my mind. What if it turns out that they're wrong? I guess it isn't a big deal, we can make exchanges and be done with that. At least the nursery is mint green and gray with white furniture. No pinks or blues here!
My tummy feels like a tight balloon, it is just growing and growing!
I wake up super hungry in the morning. Which means I can't sleep in because I can't stop thinking about eating. And so it begins!
The somersaults and kicking feel pretty amazing. I feel them the most when I eat, and lie down. Of course when I'm active during the day she may be kicking just as much, I just don't feel them. I cannot believe we are down to roughly 3 months now, before we get to meet her. I am still in awe of it all. And it is only the beginning!
Have we really come to the end of May already?
We had our 20 week anatomy ultrasound three weeks ago, and had to wait to find out baby's gender. We had a small gender reveal party a couple of days after the appointment, to be surprised along with everyone else. It was SO much fun, and I am so glad we did it.
I have to admit, for 5 months I was thinking it was a boy, and I felt a slight pang of disappointment for feeling disappointed, but it really is a strong word for how I actually felt. I envisioned my life with a house full of boys, busy with baseball and hockey games, playing with our dogs, (still working on convincing the hubs to get another) full of energy and happiness. I love boy stuff, I've never been a frilly pink kind of girl. I started to feel like a bad person, like I could never be a good mother to a little girl. I always seemed to get along better with the opposite sex, even as a little girl myself. We are sensitive, complex creatures! But I got past all of that, I just needed to change my mindset completely. I thought about how amazing Rhoads will be with a girl, and yes, even me. I don't have to dress her in frilly pink stuff, there are plenty of yellows, purples and green outfits out there. I will raise her to be confident, strong, and intelligent. She will think for herself, respect and be respected. It will be tough, but someone has to do it!
The shower invitations have been mailed out yesterday. They were handmade, and let me tell you, they were a lot of work, but it beats paying up the ying yang for invitations. I don't care how cute they are, I'm sorry but I can't justify paying over $100 for some paper. Of course this meant that I needed to get on our registries to make final modifications. Here I thought we were all good with most of the basic stuff for baby, but after finishing both Babies R Us and Amazon registries, I counted 295 total items that we registered for. Seriously?! For all I know, we may not need it all but I'm a research junkie so evidently, in my mind, I am making myself think that I need all of those things. It's hard because we won't know what's what until baby arrives. I keep calling her "baby" because we have narrowed it down to 3 names, and when we meet her, I think we will know which one is best for her. Ughhh what if it's a boy, though? The thought keeps creeping into my mind. What if it turns out that they're wrong? I guess it isn't a big deal, we can make exchanges and be done with that. At least the nursery is mint green and gray with white furniture. No pinks or blues here!
My tummy feels like a tight balloon, it is just growing and growing!
I wake up super hungry in the morning. Which means I can't sleep in because I can't stop thinking about eating. And so it begins!
The somersaults and kicking feel pretty amazing. I feel them the most when I eat, and lie down. Of course when I'm active during the day she may be kicking just as much, I just don't feel them. I cannot believe we are down to roughly 3 months now, before we get to meet her. I am still in awe of it all. And it is only the beginning!
Saturday, April 6, 2013
No Turning Back Now! ;)
Listening to: Mumford & Sons, Sigh No More
Well, it is official. Everyone that knows us now knows we are expecting. Baby is due September 28th, only 5 days after my 31st birthday. Of course, this Rhoads baby will have their own agenda. He or she will come when they want, if they are anything like their mama! It is exciting getting ready for baby, as well as a bit overwhelming and stressful. But with the help of our families and friends, I know we will be just fine.
I am exactly 15 weeks along as of today. I had fatigue and nausea pretty much every day until last week, the nausea began to slowly subside during the day and I would only feel nauseated at night. I found that eating Fruit Loops before bed helped a lot, and I wasn't starving when I woke up in the morning. That has been my food throughout this pregnancy thus far, Fruit Loops!!! Having something in my stomach all day was helpful. My food aversions are strange, I can't have coffee! Even if I wanted to have some, it just makes me sick. I normally LOVE coffee. Everyone knows I love chocolate. I don't crave it at all. Also, fruit and salads taste like heaven. Gotta love Mother Nature for keeping us healthy!
A few things I'm experiencing but have never heard about pregnancy: I gag when I brush my teeth. I don't know what it is, I'm guessing my gag reflex is extra sensitive. I've also noticed I've become sensitive to bright lights, and loud noise. There is some weird cramping going on in the lower abdomen, from stretching. At times it feels like menstrual cramps but they don't last very long. It definitely feels like I have a lemon inside me, but that was how big baby was last week. According to The Bump, baby is the size of a navel orange now. It is so amazing how fast they grow. I have found that I'm breathless when I go upstairs, or walk fast. Naps have become my best friend. Speaking of which...until next time! ;)
Well, it is official. Everyone that knows us now knows we are expecting. Baby is due September 28th, only 5 days after my 31st birthday. Of course, this Rhoads baby will have their own agenda. He or she will come when they want, if they are anything like their mama! It is exciting getting ready for baby, as well as a bit overwhelming and stressful. But with the help of our families and friends, I know we will be just fine.
I am exactly 15 weeks along as of today. I had fatigue and nausea pretty much every day until last week, the nausea began to slowly subside during the day and I would only feel nauseated at night. I found that eating Fruit Loops before bed helped a lot, and I wasn't starving when I woke up in the morning. That has been my food throughout this pregnancy thus far, Fruit Loops!!! Having something in my stomach all day was helpful. My food aversions are strange, I can't have coffee! Even if I wanted to have some, it just makes me sick. I normally LOVE coffee. Everyone knows I love chocolate. I don't crave it at all. Also, fruit and salads taste like heaven. Gotta love Mother Nature for keeping us healthy!
A few things I'm experiencing but have never heard about pregnancy: I gag when I brush my teeth. I don't know what it is, I'm guessing my gag reflex is extra sensitive. I've also noticed I've become sensitive to bright lights, and loud noise. There is some weird cramping going on in the lower abdomen, from stretching. At times it feels like menstrual cramps but they don't last very long. It definitely feels like I have a lemon inside me, but that was how big baby was last week. According to The Bump, baby is the size of a navel orange now. It is so amazing how fast they grow. I have found that I'm breathless when I go upstairs, or walk fast. Naps have become my best friend. Speaking of which...until next time! ;)
Friday, February 1, 2013
Changes Underway
Listening to: Fiona Apple, The Idler Wheel
You know you're 30 years old when you stay home on a Friday night and are really looking forward to watching Dateline. God, I love that show. It is definitely not a complaint by any means, I can definitely relate to that meme that reads, "I may be 30, but I feel 20. Then I go out with 20 year-olds then I'm like, yep. I'm 30". Funny stuff.
So, a lot of changes are underway but I can't inform anyone of what these changes are just yet. It could be a new promotion or job, a new home, it could be anything, really. :) For now, I will just say that we will surprise many people. I guess you could say I would not want to jinx it. But I'm feeling rather happy, excited, yet a bit overwhelmed and slightly nervous. It's a roller coaster of emotions for both Matt and I. We won't know what's to come until we're living it.
Don't you hate reading stuff like this? It's like a vague facebook status update that you absolutely must know about. ;)
Until next time, hasta luego.
You know you're 30 years old when you stay home on a Friday night and are really looking forward to watching Dateline. God, I love that show. It is definitely not a complaint by any means, I can definitely relate to that meme that reads, "I may be 30, but I feel 20. Then I go out with 20 year-olds then I'm like, yep. I'm 30". Funny stuff.
So, a lot of changes are underway but I can't inform anyone of what these changes are just yet. It could be a new promotion or job, a new home, it could be anything, really. :) For now, I will just say that we will surprise many people. I guess you could say I would not want to jinx it. But I'm feeling rather happy, excited, yet a bit overwhelmed and slightly nervous. It's a roller coaster of emotions for both Matt and I. We won't know what's to come until we're living it.
Don't you hate reading stuff like this? It's like a vague facebook status update that you absolutely must know about. ;)
Until next time, hasta luego.
Monday, January 21, 2013
We Love Lake Tahoe!
Music: Our Lady Peace, Gravity
I told myself I would journal while we take our small vacations, but I haven't yet. I have decided to briefly write about our last Tahoe trip, taken last weekend with some obligatory photos. :)
I absolutely love living in California! We are 45 minutes away from the beach, roughly 4 hours from the snow during the winter. It can't get any better than this.
We like to leave early, not only to catch the sunrise, but it also allows time to shop for food, and drive a little and/or play in the snow before we check into our hotel.
In my family, we have a little road trip morning tradition. We stop off at a donut and coffee shop before hitting the road. Matt and I have been known to do the same, only we opt for healthier options, like a peanut butter bagel and soy milk. We listen to music and sing along, have deep, meaningful conversations, and I will take short naps since Gio is not much of a morning person. I've never really been much of a snow person either, we weren't exposed to it too much growing up. The more I go now though, I find that I love it!
Matt was an avid skiier as a child, but when he was in his high school years he found snowboarding was more his cup of tea. In college, whenever he and his friends had a break they would stay in cheap little motels, located within walking distance of either Heavenly or NorthStar, to snowboard all day long. We've stayed in said hotels before, but since I'm too chicken to snowboard, I have to figure out ways to entertain myself. Matt wanted us to stay in a much nicer room for me to relax in this time He actually goes a couple of hours at a time, so it isn't too bad. I would like to try to learn to ski or snowboard, but I want to take baby steps. It is a little intimidating, it feels like everyone knows what they're doing. Skiing seems easier, so I may just give that a try soon.
We stayed at the Embassy Suites hotel, near the Village and gondola for Heavenly. This place is so awesome, I felt like royalty. We have accumulated points through our credit cards so it is essentially free for any Hilton hotels we want to use. Score!
I swam in the indoor pool for a bit to relax, hit the spa, watched cable TV in my super comfortable room- mind you, we haven't had cable in over two years so this is a treat for me- although I do not miss it and I feel it is a waste of money- weird? I know, I'm a strange, strange girl. I watched a documentary about the Concordia cruise ship accident. How terrifying! Here I go getting off track...I read, do my nails, upload any photos I've taken on our trip thus far, and I've actually gone to a couple of great spas for facials and massages. The hotel offers a free breakfast buffet every morning, with made to order omelets, and believe me, I couldn't be happier about that. Matt and I went to happy hour a couple of days in a row, in the hotel lodge from 4:30-6:30 with any free cocktails of your choice and snacks like popcorn, pretzels and goldfish crackers.We like to make our own lunch and have snacks on hand, but we go out for dinner. It feels like date night every night. :)
My favorite part of our recent trip was driving around the lake, stopping off at some beautiful views to take pictures and play in the snow. We learned a lot about the Washoe Native Americans who resided in the area (and some still do).
On our fourth day, we drove to the other side of the lake, so Matt could snowboard for a couple of hours at North Star, and I chilled at their new lodge. I am partial to warmth, and unlimited hot chocolate refills!
Until next time, Tahoe! <3
I told myself I would journal while we take our small vacations, but I haven't yet. I have decided to briefly write about our last Tahoe trip, taken last weekend with some obligatory photos. :)
I absolutely love living in California! We are 45 minutes away from the beach, roughly 4 hours from the snow during the winter. It can't get any better than this.
We like to leave early, not only to catch the sunrise, but it also allows time to shop for food, and drive a little and/or play in the snow before we check into our hotel.
In my family, we have a little road trip morning tradition. We stop off at a donut and coffee shop before hitting the road. Matt and I have been known to do the same, only we opt for healthier options, like a peanut butter bagel and soy milk. We listen to music and sing along, have deep, meaningful conversations, and I will take short naps since Gio is not much of a morning person. I've never really been much of a snow person either, we weren't exposed to it too much growing up. The more I go now though, I find that I love it!
Matt was an avid skiier as a child, but when he was in his high school years he found snowboarding was more his cup of tea. In college, whenever he and his friends had a break they would stay in cheap little motels, located within walking distance of either Heavenly or NorthStar, to snowboard all day long. We've stayed in said hotels before, but since I'm too chicken to snowboard, I have to figure out ways to entertain myself. Matt wanted us to stay in a much nicer room for me to relax in this time He actually goes a couple of hours at a time, so it isn't too bad. I would like to try to learn to ski or snowboard, but I want to take baby steps. It is a little intimidating, it feels like everyone knows what they're doing. Skiing seems easier, so I may just give that a try soon.
We stayed at the Embassy Suites hotel, near the Village and gondola for Heavenly. This place is so awesome, I felt like royalty. We have accumulated points through our credit cards so it is essentially free for any Hilton hotels we want to use. Score!
 |
| Look! Koi fish! It's the little things... |
 |
| I'm scared of heights, but I went on the gondola! Go me! |
 |
| Good morning, Tahoe! |
 |
| In the Village, by the gondolas, a snow fountain. How cool is that? |
 |
| peaceful |
I swam in the indoor pool for a bit to relax, hit the spa, watched cable TV in my super comfortable room- mind you, we haven't had cable in over two years so this is a treat for me- although I do not miss it and I feel it is a waste of money- weird? I know, I'm a strange, strange girl. I watched a documentary about the Concordia cruise ship accident. How terrifying! Here I go getting off track...I read, do my nails, upload any photos I've taken on our trip thus far, and I've actually gone to a couple of great spas for facials and massages. The hotel offers a free breakfast buffet every morning, with made to order omelets, and believe me, I couldn't be happier about that. Matt and I went to happy hour a couple of days in a row, in the hotel lodge from 4:30-6:30 with any free cocktails of your choice and snacks like popcorn, pretzels and goldfish crackers.We like to make our own lunch and have snacks on hand, but we go out for dinner. It feels like date night every night. :)
My favorite part of our recent trip was driving around the lake, stopping off at some beautiful views to take pictures and play in the snow. We learned a lot about the Washoe Native Americans who resided in the area (and some still do).
 |
| goobers |
On our fourth day, we drove to the other side of the lake, so Matt could snowboard for a couple of hours at North Star, and I chilled at their new lodge. I am partial to warmth, and unlimited hot chocolate refills!
Until next time, Tahoe! <3
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Peanut Butter Sandwich Cookies
I have high hopes that this recipe is amazingly awesome. I just watched an episode of America's Test Kitchen, and when I looked up this recipe online, I had to register with them. I'm not a fan of getting junk mail, but I was willing to deal with it all for this recipe. I'm not a huge peanut butter cookie fan, but my husband is. I couldn't pin the recipe, because all who click on it have to register and I did not want to put someone else through that. Haha! I can't wait to try this out.
Makes 24 cookies
Do not use unsalted peanut butter for this recipe.
Ingredients
Cookies
- 1 1/4cups (6 1/4 ounces) raw peanuts, toasted and cooled
- 3/4cup (3 3/4 ounces) all-purpose flour
- 1teaspoon baking soda
- 1/2teaspoon salt
- 3tablespoons unsalted butter, melted
- 1/2cup creamy peanut butter
- 1/2cup (3 1/2 ounces) granulated sugar
- 1/2cup packed (3 1/2 ounces) light brown sugar
- 3tablespoons whole milk
- 1large egg
Filling
- 3/4cup creamy peanut butter
- 3tablespoons unsalted butter
- 1cup (4 ounces) confectioners' sugar
Instructions
- 1. FOR THE COOKIES: Adjust oven racks to upper-middle and lower-middle positions and heat oven to 350 degrees. Line 2 baking sheets with parchment paper. Pulse peanuts in food processor until finely chopped, about 8 pulses. Whisk flour, baking soda, and salt together in bowl. Whisk butter, peanut butter, granulated sugar, brown sugar, milk, and egg together in second bowl. Stir flour mixture into peanut butter mixture with rubber spatula until combined. Stir in peanuts until evenly distributed.
- 2. Using #60 scoop or tablespoon measure, place 12 mounds, evenly spaced, on each prepared baking sheet. Using damp hand, flatten mounds until 2 inches in diameter.
- 3. Bake until deep golden brown and firm to touch, 15 to 18 minutes, switching and rotating sheets halfway through baking. Let cookies cool on sheets for 5 minutes. Transfer cookies to wire rack and let cool completely, about 30 minutes. Repeat portioning and baking remaining dough.
- 4. FOR THE FILLING: Microwave peanut butter and butter until butter is melted and warm, about 40 seconds. Using rubber spatula, stir in confectioners’ sugar until combined.
- 5. TO ASSEMBLE: Place 24 cookies upside down on work surface. Place 1 level tablespoon (or #60 scoop) warm filling in center of each cookie. Place second cookie on top of filling, right side up, pressing gently until filling spreads to edges. Allow filling to set for 1 hour before serving. Assembled cookies can be stored in airtight container for up to 3 days.
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