Have we really come to the end of May already?
We had our 20 week anatomy ultrasound three weeks ago, and had to wait to find out baby's gender. We had a small gender reveal party a couple of days after the appointment, to be surprised along with everyone else. It was SO much fun, and I am so glad we did it.
I have to admit, for 5 months I was thinking it was a boy, and I felt a slight pang of disappointment for feeling disappointed, but it really is a strong word for how I actually felt. I envisioned my life with a house full of boys, busy with baseball and hockey games, playing with our dogs, (still working on convincing the hubs to get another) full of energy and happiness. I love boy stuff, I've never been a frilly pink kind of girl. I started to feel like a bad person, like I could never be a good mother to a little girl. I always seemed to get along better with the opposite sex, even as a little girl myself. We are sensitive, complex creatures! But I got past all of that, I just needed to change my mindset completely. I thought about how amazing Rhoads will be with a girl, and yes, even me. I don't have to dress her in frilly pink stuff, there are plenty of yellows, purples and green outfits out there. I will raise her to be confident, strong, and intelligent. She will think for herself, respect and be respected. It will be tough, but someone has to do it!
The shower invitations have been mailed out yesterday. They were handmade, and let me tell you, they were a lot of work, but it beats paying up the ying yang for invitations. I don't care how cute they are, I'm sorry but I can't justify paying over $100 for some paper. Of course this meant that I needed to get on our registries to make final modifications. Here I thought we were all good with most of the basic stuff for baby, but after finishing both Babies R Us and Amazon registries, I counted 295 total items that we registered for. Seriously?! For all I know, we may not need it all but I'm a research junkie so evidently, in my mind, I am making myself think that I need all of those things. It's hard because we won't know what's what until baby arrives. I keep calling her "baby" because we have narrowed it down to 3 names, and when we meet her, I think we will know which one is best for her. Ughhh what if it's a boy, though? The thought keeps creeping into my mind. What if it turns out that they're wrong? I guess it isn't a big deal, we can make exchanges and be done with that. At least the nursery is mint green and gray with white furniture. No pinks or blues here!
My tummy feels like a tight balloon, it is just growing and growing!
I wake up super hungry in the morning. Which means I can't sleep in because I can't stop thinking about eating. And so it begins!
The somersaults and kicking feel pretty amazing. I feel them the most when I eat, and lie down. Of course when I'm active during the day she may be kicking just as much, I just don't feel them. I cannot believe we are down to roughly 3 months now, before we get to meet her. I am still in awe of it all. And it is only the beginning!
